Hi! I'm new around here!

                                                                       

                            

I feel like an outsider quite often. How about you? 

I felt comfortable in my previous community and then I went off and moved to a new community. It was my own choice, of course, so I must bear the consequences.

It's not easy to start over with anything. Finding new neighborhood friends, new church friends or new pickleball playmates can bring an extra dose of challenging. This growth step was tough as a child. It's still tough as an adult.

We have to be vulnerable as we never outgrow the timeless question, "Will you play with me?!" 

How 'bout when we take it a personal step further - "Do you like me? Check Yes or No!" 

We've either silently or openly asked this question over and over in our youth. Is it still pertinent way into adulthood? Surprisingly, yes. 

It took a while but I found my pickleball community. I was happy with it. I felt welcomed by it. I felt comfortable. My peeps liked me even when my game play was a bit off. There was friendly bench banter between games. I looked forward to hanging and playing with my peeps.

After moving to a more northern county, I kept driving the 40 minute commute to continue being with my peeps. It easier to stay with the familiar. The same keeps you sane. That is until it becomes ridiculous to do so. Surely there are some friendly people closer to my new home. I shouldn't discount them before I even meet them. Right?! Trying to give myself a pep talk for stepping out.

Dear friends might be 40 minutes away. I can keep them. I should. I shall. But who knows if a new close friend is right around my corner. I won't gain unless I go.

So, I did go. I ventured out. I decided it was worth cutting the attachment strings. I didn't need to drive so long as I had done for so long. 

Why not give a park near me a try. These northerners can't be that bad!

Well...walking into a crowded gym quickly brought back memories of walking into a crowded school lunchroom. Neither of these are vastly different. Conversation is buzzing loudly. Individuals are engaged with each other not even noticing my entrance. I feel invisible. 

Crazy how we never outgrow that feeling. That awkwardness. That need to find our place in a new space. 

Where do I sit? Where do I put my lunch tray? Where do I park my pickleball bag?

It's not easy being the new kid on the block. The new girl in town. I was just as apprehensive this weekend when I was invited to a gathering for the "ladies of the cul-de-sac." I should have been excited but instead I was nervous and debated whether to attend. Asking my husband to pray for me before I left. I returned home around 11:00pm to my husband's surprise. Yes, I had a great time. 😀

We often need to give ourselves a kick in the pants. A kick out the door and off our comfy couch into an out-of-comfort zone might be the perfect to do. I was glad I did last Saturday night.  

I was also glad when I reached out to others on the bench waiting to play, instead of waiting for others to reach out to me. The first time I did I was surprised. I was convicted when the man I was waiting to first speak to me finally did. He just moved here from California so was even newer than me. So, in turn I was being unwelcoming to him.  You never know who's new! It's most likely not just you. Not just me. 

It was a life lesson to not sit back but be the first to reach out.

I volunteer with a ministry where I reach out to local churches in my part of town. I've built a relationship with these churches so why would I cut them off and seek new churches in my new area. It's because I'm now in a new area. I need to embrace what's new. My new community. My new potential peeps. I should take the risk to be all in where I am. 

All it takes is saying, "Hi! I'm new around here!" Adding a new neighborly smile might help too. 

Count that as a kick in both our pants! 😁

You might be new

but get a clue.

Being a friend

may help you too!